Thursday, October 29, 2009 at 7:53 AM
Okay, I lied. I didn't have enough to say or enough time to blog once a week. However, I now have free time for the first time in about a month, and it feels awesome. I still have a paper due next week, but that's not until Thursday and I'm going to enjoy my weekend while it lasts. This is my favorite part of the year-the changing of the seasons, halloween, my birthday, thanksgiving, christmas, new years, my sister's birthday, and then my mom's birthday all rush together and pass by in a wave. There's so much to look forward to in such a short period of time!!

The thing about free time is that you are left alone with your thoughts. Especially with the game of assassins (spoon tag?) going on around me and everybody clutching their spoons frantically whenever someone Asian walks towards them, somehow places that offer solitude are just more comforting as of late.

"You and I, truth and lies"




I have a lot to say but no way to say them. Blogging is no longer a release because I have to worry about who's reading it and how they will react.

Lovely Rainy Days

Tuesday, October 13, 2009 at 8:25 AM
This weekend was a much needed break from reality; S and Y both visited, and there were lots of memories created, some of which aren't remembered haha. Time is absolutely flying by though...this year even more so than last year. Although as all the upperclassmen tell me, time only keeps going faster after this. It's back to work though, I've got to be on top of my stuff this week if I want to have a worry free weekend in New York later.

The weather is changing again. The leaves barely had a chance to turn red before rain moved in over Chesnut Hill, MA and the temperature drops around 20 to 30 degrees with the sunset. However, I have to say...despite how much I complain I absolutely love the rain. I love waking up to the sound of raindrops on the roof, I love the way the world takes on a hue of gray, I love splashing through puddles with my indestructible rainboots. I like the idea of how the world is being washed clean...I think my favorite thing to do on rainy days is to curl up somewhere comfortable (a bed preferably) next to a window and watch the rain as I read. A hot beverage is appreciated, but not necessary. With the puddles forming and flowing over outside, I feel a lot more peaceful and content and this is never something I could complain about.

What is love? Ever since I started taking Health Psychology, I find myself coming back to the question, thinking about it even when I don't need to. I find myself frustrated over this question, because I am unable to answer it and yet I am so sure that I know what it is. A lack of eloquence, I suppose. Love is a concept surely, love is blind, love is rewarding and love is kind. Love is something you're supposed to feel in your gut and in your soul and when you know, you know. Love is when you want the absolute best for the object of your affections and you want to help them get there with no expectations for reward because when they're happy, you are too. Love is when you would do anything for them, because you trust them and know that they would never take more than you could give. I don't know...how do you describe a feeling?



Post definitely to be continued...for the meantime im going to sing my heart out and attempt to play piano :)

Bound to Linger On

Thursday, October 8, 2009 at 11:26 AM
This blogging once a week thing is a lot harder than it seems haha. Sometimes it's that I have nothing to say, sometimes it's that I don't have the time or the right words to say what I want to say, but I'm trying!

Things are still ridiculously busy, and I don't think I am going to get a break anytime soon. Even the weekends are fraught with performances and meetings, and all free time is devoted to slogging through mounds of work so that I'm not behind the next day or week. I'm not saying that everything I'm doing isn't worth it, but it kind of feels that way. I haven't had a good day to myself for doing nothing in awhile, or even just a few hours of hanging out with a friend with no second agenda (making it out to an event, studying together, etc.) I'm not overloaded, but I feel like I'm right at the tipping point and at any moment I could fall over the other side. I'm trying really hard and succeeding in getting at least 8 hours of sleep a day, attending all the events I can, finishing all my work for the next day early, not procrastinating, and still making time for practice, but I'm scared shitless of the day I can't stay on top of it anymore. The next 3 weeks will include: a trip to New York, my sister visiting, S visiting, multiple CSA and other events, a lot of meetings (with teachers and otherwise), my parents visiting, 2 papers, 3 midterms, 2 tests and 2 quizzes. It looks like Halloween will be the first weekend I can really relax, but not even really...there's a paper due the Thursday after...So maybe my birthday? SORRY, this kind of just turned into a to-do list for the next month, but I need to write it down somewhere haha.

A gorgeous painting I found this morning...I want this hanging in my house when I grow up.
Serigraph-Helen Frankethaler


Okay, my brain is really scattered and I can't think of any cohesive idea which would make for a non-boring paragraph, so here is the sum of my thoughts:
  • HMMM. Also need to find a Halloween costume....any ideas?? Something not too expensive/hard to put together, preferably :)
  • as it turns out, earphones are actually more needed in my daily life than an ipod itself...hopefully I'll get both soon
  • I NEED A JOB :(
  • It's been kind of hard falling asleep again...I'm not even thinking about anything important, just like dance moves or my outfit the next day....SUCKS.
  • I'm actually kind of losing weight this year because I don't have time to eat
  • Kleerup ft. Lykke Li- Until We Bleed is my new favorite song...I noticed I have a tendency to like artists out of Sweden
  • Being a girl sucks...never know if I'm actually feeling something or if it's just my hormones driving me crazy.



HMMMM. That's about it. Topics for next time: mixing friends with work, being yourself in a new environment. I'm just waiting for time to pass...

"Back to you, it always comes, back to you...Doesn't it scare you, your will is not as strong as it, used to be"